First step
by Tidoo
Summary: They worked togheter, they lived toghter, the fought togheter. But between them it was much more than that. And it began slowly, a step at a time.
1. Chapter 1

Of course, you could trust Hanji to spill the bill. It was strange how such a smart woman could easily lack so much of subtilty. Or maybe she was doing it deliberately, just for fun. She must have seen this as a strange form of experience on the living. At least that was the only vaguely acceptable explanation Petra had managed to find some comfort in the deepest of her intense mortification.

She was already embarrassed enough by her own feelings, she didn't need to have her superior, or any others of her team, to be informed of her attraction for Rivaille. But obviously, as soon as Hanji understood that Petra's interest for him was not solely professional, she had to talk about it.

And of course, she hadn't the slightest bit of delicacy or discretion. She had to babble about it in the middle of the dinning hall, with Rivaille a few meters away, just to be sure Petra would be all the more embarrassed. Luckily for the small blond, the captain merely raised an eyebrow at her, a bit surprised, but his gaze remained unchanged, cold and empty, as if it didn't matter to him. Petra should have felt relieved, but somehow she felt more betrayed by his blatant disregard, as if all of this, all of her wasn't important. So without a word, she left the room and went tending the horses under Hanji noisy comments. She certainly hadn't finished her study on human behavior but Petra couldn't care less. All she wanted was to flee unnoticed but she failed miserabilly. Worse, Rivaille totally ignored her and yet Petra could have sworn she felt his eyes on her back as she came through the door in silence.

- oOo -

Her heart skipped a beat when she saw a shadow in the hallway. It was late and no one should have wandered on this floor. That was why she stayed in the barn so late, after all.

"Are you aware of how much a shitty idea it is?"

Rivaille stood in front of her without her seeing him move. He was just between her and the door so Petra had no way to escape. Her throat tightened and she thanked the darkness that hid her blush when she looked up at her superior and asked in a shaky voice, "What are you talking about, sir?"

He snorted and got even closer, to stand just in front of her. He then put a finger under her chin to force her to look at him in the eye.

"You and me, Petra. This is a very bad idea. Besides our age difference, I'm your superior so it would be very unwise to be more than we are and will virtually prevent any progress you may have in your career."

"I don't want to..."

"And there will be the inevitable comments from the rest of the squad, the teasing, the hints, the jokes."

He paused when he saw seeing she still didn't react then he added, "And of course, questions."

Petra hesitated, somewhat uncertain about the proper response he wanted. This whole conversation was absurd because she had never done anything to show him her interest and yet, he still had the trouble to come to warn her as if he feared she tried to seduce him. And he was close, way too close.

Squaring her shoulders, Petra faced her superior with an assurance that she usually reserved for battle. But it was a kind of battle here too.

"With all my respect, Captain, from my point of view, the comments are already there, whether you like it or not. This is how the team works. Erd is always criticizing my height, Gunter mocks my lack of patience, which is not very feminine and so unladylike and do I have to remind you of Auruo blonds'jokes?"

She caught his eye and he had nothing to say.

"I'm used to be joked around and I can pretty stand for myself, so now, Captain, the real question is : what do you want to do?"

Crossing her arms, she waited and with each breath she took, she realized what she had said and all that that entailed. Her heart lurched when she caught Rivaille's passive glare and she began to lost her composure when he persisted in his silence. But still, she refused to give up. After all, she had very little to lose by now. Everybody knew what she felt and she would be laughed after for quite some time.

Sighing, she looked away and said, "Listen, whatever you say, it won't change how I feel, so just deal with it. It's not that bad, you know. I won't disturb you, won't harass you, or ask for anything." In a smaller voice, she added, "I should have strangled Hanji as soon as she started looking at me with her beady eyes and cut out her tongue to make sure she kee..."

Petra never had the chance to finish her tirade. Rivaille pressed his whole body against hers and propped her chin in his hand to kiss her. It wasn't a passionate kiss, barely a touch of the lips, the shadow of a promise of what could be and Petra shuddered. He backed away, smirking, and it was the only evidence of what he had done. Then he told her flatly,"Don't be violent with your comrades, Petra. As painful as they are, they're also the best hope for humanity."

He simply walked past her and down the stairs as if he just had to reprimand for a trifle, and Petra felt embarrassment and anger prevail over her reason when he added mocking tone, "Even as a shorty like you should understand that it's so unladylike."

"Hey! Fuck you Captain!"

One foot on the first step, he gave him a neutral look and replied,"Whenever you want to Petra. I'll let you lead the way between us, I don't want any trouble."

And he disappeared without a sound, leaving the young woman as ecstatic as she was frustrated.

* * *

_So, well, it's so not my fault! It was all becaus__e_ they're just so cute and there was this prompt on SnK kink meme about them and I just had to write something so well, here it is.

_Sorry if my English sucks, it's been way too long since I tried to write and well... I was nearly late to school to get back my girls just because I wanted to proof-read this and... ok, my life is just so facinating, I'll stop rambling. There may be a sequel, or a second chapter, just to join the PoT club. Enphasis on may because of said life.  
_


	2. Chapter 2

The mission had been a complete failure and although Petra did a pretty good job to protect herself, she still came back with some cracked ribs and a slightly sprained ankle. But even if her body was mostly unaffected, she kept a silente distress in her stomach, a morbid fear that she wasn't able to discard. She had managed to kill seven Titans with the help of her group, but the latter one had been able to catch Alex before she could finish it. By the time Petra cut its neck, the monster had already planted its teeth in the middle of the soldier's back and his cry of pain and panic as his blood run freely out of the wound was still ringing in her ears hours later, when she tried in vain to rest. With a huff, she realised she couldn't sleep like that. The silence of her small room was oppressive and finally, against the medic's recommendations, she rose and went to get some fresh the air. It was the only thing to do to ease her mind.

It was late so of course, all the soldiers were back in their quarter but Petra didn't mind the stillness of the corridors and the quiet of the night. She wasn't looking for superficial conversations or noisy environnement. She just wanted to forget so when she left her bed, Petra had thought about going to the stables. Horses appeased her. Their smell, their steady breathing, their warmth, their mere presence was honest comfort. They were alive and it was certainly the best thing she she could get right now.

But in the end, she never left the dorms. She dragged her feet slowly down the stairs and she tried her best not to damage her ankle any more as she went down the steps. Then, instead of going to the barn, she stopped to the lower floor and walked down the hallway without thinking. She knocked and pushed the door open without waiting for an answer and then closed it behind her, taking care to lock it right away.

The room was dark, and even darker after the light of all the common areas, so all Petra could see was the vague shape of a body lying on the bed. She held her breath when she heard the rustle of sheets but Rivaille made no comment on her intrusion, and she might have thought he was asleep hadn't she felt the intensity of his gaze on her since she walked in.

The oil lamp on his bedside was so down it only created sinister shadows on ceiling and did nothing to light up the room. It was really not a place to relax with that gloomy atmosphere and yet, Petra had no desire to be somewhere else. Without a word, she took a step forward and tried to sit on the edge of the mattress but Rivaille stopped her by rolling to her side, blocking her path. He sat up and put his hands on her hips to force her to stand in front of him. "What the hell are you doing?"

Petra swallowed, unsure of how she should answer him because she thought her mere presence in his room after everything they had endured that day was explicite enough. She could still feel Rivaille's glare on her as he watched her silently through the darkness and she felt as if he was trying to measure her determination.

"I know you're shocked, but it's not a reason to make shitty decisions," he whispered harshly.

He offended her more than she wanted to admit and Petra had to take a deep breath to calm her nerves before she leaned forward to put her forehead on his. "If it can reassure you to think I only came here to get some comfort me, go ahead."

She was a bit smug but he wasn't impressed.

"So what?"

"So yes, I could use some company, but I don't really need to be reassured and comforted like a child."

He snorted and she flexed her fingers, digging her nails into her palms. She didn't want to fight, not with him, not for something so ridiculous.

"You should have gone to Hanji, or Mike, they are much nicer and far more sympathetic than me."

And the list could go on, they both knew it. He could mention many other soldiers whom she was close to, but Petra shook her head and drapped her arms on his shoulders.

"I don't want to intrude more than I already did, Captain, and I won't force anything onto you, so if you want me to leave, just say so. Don't start looking for lame excuses."

Rivaille swore under his breath but he did not reject her when she leaned a little more against him. He only sighed when she put one knee on the cot to get closer so she could whisper in his ear, "We can also say that I chose you because that way, the whole squad won't know by the sunrise I had a moment of weakness."

They both knew how this argument was false but Rivaille accepted this version rather than a direct statement of what she really felt. Slowly, he leaned back and without another word, he made room in his bed and agreed to keep her against him for the night. After all, for him too, the mission had been difficult and some silent company couldn't hurt him.

* * *

_In case you were wondering, I don't think it's really a sequel of the first chapter. It just happened to fit the title and I didn't want to create a new story because I'm lazy. And I kind of wanted to make a collection about how they slowly became more than comrades.  
_

_And thanks a bunch for all the favs I get before. It was very nice of you !_


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